Kicker Shai

We just wanted to post a little update on how Shai is doing as of late. He LOVES to kick and move. His kicks are getting stronger day by day. Pete was finally able to feel him kick for the first time this week. I believe it was really special for him. You would think those kicks would be a painful reminder of what lays ahead for Shai and our family but it actually makes my heart joyful to feel each and every one. Every kick means we have another precious day with Shai. I have grown to look forward to the times when he moves inside.

We have a doctors appointment tomorrow morning at 10:30a before Pete and I leave for our trip to Washington state. I have to admit these appointments tend to spring up a little apprehension in my heart. I can have some control issues and I want to be able to make everything okay. We trust that God has his precious, little life in His BIG hands. Please pray that everything looks good and that I am not starting to retain too much amniotic fluid. That is a problem that can arise with these little ones when they are in the womb. They do not have the brain function to swallow the fluid like normal babies. That means I can start to retain too much fluid and have to deliver Shai earlier than planned or expected.

Several people have asked me if we believe that God can heal Shai and if He will. I have pondered on this question and prayed fervently for Shai's healing. I DO believe that God is fully capable of healing little Shai. He is the same God that created the universe and all within it. He has done miracles from the Old Testament to the New Testament. So YES, GOD IS ABLE!!! However, I also know that God is bigger than I am and sees a far greater picture than I do. Pete and I work in the children's ministry at our church on Sundays. We are beginning to study Mark and the lesson we had this past week is about how Jesus forgives and heals the paralytic man whose friends brought him to Jesus. It can be found in Mark 2: 1-13. What great faith those friends had to believe that if they could just get their friend to Jesus, he would be healed. They carried him all the way to see Jesus and then lowered him through the roof because they could not get through the crowds any other way. Jesus did not do what they expected however, he did something greater! He forgave the man of his sins because He saw his great faith. When questioned about his authority to do these things, he healed the man of his physical ailments. The first and most important thing Jesus did was to forgive this man and allow him to have eternity with God. As I have looked at miracles in the bible, the purpose was always to bring God glory and make His name known. So here is how I see it.  If Shai's life can bring God the most glory by being short but precious and valuable, then so be it. If Shai's life can bring Him the most Glory by being healed miraculously, then wonderful! No matter what, we want Shai's life on this earth to have meaning and purpose. This has not always been easy to grasp on this journey so far.  I want to see my child grow and be a part of his wonderful life on this earth. We cry many tears for the life that we will probably not get to see. We continue to trust in who God is and the fact that He has a plan for our lives and Shai's life that is far greater than we can think or imagine.

Thank you again for all your thoughts and prayers. They truly have brought us so much comfort in this time of our lives!